Comfort Zones

Tonight I had a chance to do something that was out of my comfort zone. I attended one of our churches get to know each other barbeque's with the kids all by myself. I often rely on Mike to start the conversations and I do not like going places by myself. Since Mike is out of town and this was the only time I could go to one I thought let's take a chance and do something I normally wouldn't do. I was excited about the possibility of meeting some new people from my church. We only know a handful of people and I have been really wanting the opportunity to get to know many others. Unfortunately I left the whole thing feeling defeated, disappointed and generally bummed out. I did not meet one new person and only had one other say hi to me.

I was upset with myself for not making more of an effort while I was there, although it was hard trying to mingle and keep my kids from throwing sand at the same time. I should have been more bold in going up to people and introducing myself. I know that people don't just fall in your lap but I guess I thought more people would be willing to strike up conversation with me. I really do enjoy our church and there are a lot of great people there, I just have to figure out how to meet them.

So as I came home with some tears in my eyes, I almost started a pity party for myself and then I got to thinking. Was the event a failure because the outcome was not what I had desired? Was it a success because I took the first step and attended something I normally would have been too afraid to? Most of all I am thinking what am I supposed to learn from this situation, what is God teaching me. I'm not completely sure, but I do know I should have prayed before we even left for God's guidance and that I would recognize his presence while there. I pray Lord that you will continue to provide me with opportunities that are outside my comfort zone so I can rely on you and await your outcomes instead of relying on myself and my own set of expectations. Thankyou that you are always present and willing to listen, guide, encourage and love me.